Your assignment is to create the contents of a note that is
found in the hallway.This note, when
found, would embarrass its writer to the greatest extent.Be creative!Be funny!Your note must be a
minimum of 400 words.
“Omg you would not believe what happened to me today! He. Looked. AT. ME. OMG I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO FAINT BUT HE LOOKED AT ME AND ASKED ME WHAT THE HOMEWORK WAS! AHHHH I know I know, this is pretty epic but I honestly couldn’t breathe for like a whole minute. He’s so hot and when he looked at me there was a light right behind his head, he looked like a Greek God! Oh dear lord I can’t even handle myself right now. But girl, this wasn’t just the first time he looked at me. The other time he was looking at me in physics for a good 7 seconds! He claims he was trying to see what time it was, but I don’t buy it. He definitely wants me. I hope he asks me to homecoming. CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT? I WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF. I can picture it now. Him and I slow dancing, his hands on my waist, my hands on his broad muscular shoulders, him looking at me with his blue eyes, and him smiling at me telling me that I look beautiful tonight. THEN BAM. WE KISS. AHHHHH MELTING OVER HERE. OMG I CAN’T. Oh by the way, are you still talking to that kid? Because I heard he’s like into you haha GET IT GIRL. Oh and can I have the homework for college algebra? I don’t know what is going on in that class. It’s like he’s speaking another language. I don’t know why all the girls find him attractive, like he’s married and ew gross, no. Maybe it’s because he teaches the subject I hate the most, oh well. “
Hey Jim, look man I got some bad news. I heard from a friend of a friend that your girlfriend is cheating on you with Bill. I’m sorry that I can’t tell this to your face, but this is the easiest way to do it. I went and confronted her about it and she said that she wasn’t sorry. She called you a cry baby backstabber, I don’t know what she could mean by that but whatever dude. Now that that’s out of the way I can’t hang out later, I’ve got to do work around the house and my parents say that they’ll take my car away if I don’t do it. Sorry about ruining your plans and telling you this bad news, I’ll talk to you later to we can sort this out From Jerry
Hey Jim its Bill, don’t believe that BS from Jerry, that’s all a lie. I found this note on the floor and read it, man that is the biggest load I’ve ever heard. Jerry stole your girl from under your nose, he’s been getting closer to her each day, I’m surprised that you didn’t notice it yet, the rest of the school has. My advice is that you should go and fight Jerry for what he did a true friend wouldn’t do that and anyone who would deserves a beating. If you want I’ll help out I’ve been needing a reason to hurt him ever since he stole my IPod, it wasn’t proven it was him but I just know that he stole it. From Bill
Jim Its Sarah, I’m sorry for not telling you that I’m leaving you but things just happened between me and Jerry. You shouldn’t hurt him he is a good guy, much better than you were by the way. I did say those things though, but only to Jerry not anyone else. Really I’m so sorry for this, I wanted this to work with us but things just didn’t go the way that I thought it would and then this happened. Please accept my apology and I hope we can still be friends. Oh and for some reason Bill if you do get this I have your IPod, Jerry did take it but he gave it to me, I’ll give it back to you next time I see you. From Sarah
To all you idiots, I don’t care about any of that. Jerry you’re a jerk for stealing my now ex-girlfriend but whatever you can have her, have fun with the crabs. Bill I don’t need to hurt him and by all means you can I won’t stop you. Sarah I was going to break up with you anyway, I’m moving to Canada so I’ll never see you again. You are all a bunch of morons, have fun together. From Jim
I just found this and wanted to say hi, so HI. From Anonymous
To the love of my life, I have loved you since the day I laid my eye on you. I haven’t told anyone the real reason I only have one eye. I told everyone I was trying to stop a thief from stealing my mom’s purse. And then his assistant thief shot a rubber band into my left eye. Actually, the real story is, I was walking home and I tripped over my untied shoelace. I fell and there was a stick on the sidewalk that punctured my eye. Please don’t tell anyone and don’t laugh. It hurt a lot. Well back to my huge crush on you. Since the day you walked into school in 2nd grade. You didn’t know anyone and you were always working alone. I was too shy to talk to you, even though I seemed to be the only one that wanted anything to do with you. But now all the girls are all over you. And it seems like I don’t have a chance anymore. I should have taken the chance when I could. I’m still that girl that watches you from a distance, longing for the day when you notice me. But I guess you already have noticed my one-eye face. Unfortunately you didn’t view me the way I wanted you to. Well I’m moving tomorrow. I just wanted to let you know my true feelings. Unfortunately I’m not the kind of person to go out and express myself. So you will never get this letter. Especially since you would know who wrote this since I’m the only girl with an eye patch. So goodbye my crush of 10 years. I will most likely never see you again. I wish you the best and hope you find love. Something I will probably never find.
- Cecilia PS- I was the one that wrote you that letter of having many babies with you. I also took your gym shirt so I could have a part of you. I still have it. I keep it in my purse. Oh and you know that kid that fell down the stairs back in September? Yeah I pushed him. So I could get to your class before you did so I could see you. Of course I get suspended for it. But I waited outside for you every day. I know it sounds creepy. But I love you. And I would do anything for you, like smell Egbert Peeboy so you don’t have to. Who’s Egbert you would ask? He’s my imaginary friend. Wow I hope nobody finds this.
Dear Diary, I am so cute! I know that EVERYBODY loves me! I just can’t help it; my face is just naturally like this. My golden curls are like beams of sunshine! They complement my blue eyes so well! Oh my gosh! I’m so pretty that I would marry myself if I could! Sigh…but that’s not possible. I don’t understand why the girls hate me. It’s not my fault that I’m prettier than them. However, I need to get some new outfits. Dad keeps throwing my beautiful dresses away! He even took away my hair ribbons! “You need to act normally,” he says. “You’re embarrassing me,” he says Humph. Well I’m not the kid he wants me to be. Dresses are the only things I like to wear! Aha! I know! I’ll ask Auntie! She always gives me her old dresses; but I got to watch out, last time she snuck in a T-shirt and jeans into the pile of dresses she gave me. Sigh. People just don’t understand me once they get to know me. The only one who does is Alexis! She’s my best friend in the whole world wide world. We exchange gossip and all of the latest fashion. She loves it when I help her do her hair. She says that my fashion sense is absolutely superb. We can talk about anything with each other. However, she gets a bit anxious whenever I start talking about boys. I can’t help it! They’re so handsome! Stupid, but handsome. I’m sure that there’s not one guy in my school who doesn’t like me. Well, except Alexis’s other best friend. He’s been avoiding me ever since he found out I am a guy. Well, so what? Guys can wear dresses! Right? I mean, they’re so cute! Especially ones with ribbons! Oh, and dresses that have matching purses! That’s just beyond amazing! I just hope that nobody realizes that I’m a guy. It’d be so embarrassing! I’ve managed to hide it by avoiding changing for gym and going to the bathroom in public. Sigh. At least I’d still have Alexis! Even though she is my sister... Oh well, the other girls aren’t my friends because they’re just jealous that a guy is cuter than them! I mean, just look at this fair skin, these crystal blue eyes, and these golden curls! Oh, wait. I forgot I don’t have a picture attached to this page so nobody can see what I look like. Eh, I’ll do it later; but now, it’s time to go to choir! I’m singing the soprano solo and I’m so excited! Hehe! I just need to put this in a safe place later. Geez, if anyone found this and learned that I was actually a guy, I’d be mortified!
Dear Sonnyboy, Hello, it’s your mother. I was just going to write you a little letter for today. I hope you don’t leave it anywhere or else I will spank you when you get home. I just wanted to let you know that you left your ointment at home this morning. You know you can’t leave it at home because if you don’t apply it every two hours you will get rashes all over your body. I hope you do that every day. I know you don’t have any problems with rashes but you can never be too careful. When you get home today I need to do a full body check for any lice and ticks that you might have gotten throughout the day. You know after the first time you got lice I was so scared for you. I hope I packed you everything you wanted for lunch today. I accidently put in a yogurt so make sure you don’t eat that since you are Lactose intolerant. Remember if you have any bit of dairy the whole entire room will be cleared out in less than a minute. Your gas will come out of you like a waterfall. I hope your diarrhea is going well. You felt really sick this morning so I hope you are feeling better. I am trying not to tell anyone that I found you this morning covered in your own vomit. It was really funny, I hope no one finds out because then everyone would laugh at my little sonnyboy and I would hate to see that. And if anyone does make fun of you make sure you tell your mommy so that I can that child a stern talking to. I will go to his own mother and say “Your sonnyboy was picking on my sonnyboy. You should reprimand him; give him a good spanking on the bottom like I give mine every night. That should set him straight.” Then he would never pick on you again. My precious little sonnyboy, I don’t know what I would do without you. You mean so much to me; I hope you never leave me, ever. And if you do I just might have a heart attack, so you won’t be getting married anytime soon. I hope you have a lovely day at school and remember you need to take a bath when you get home. Love, Mother
-You won’t believe what happened to me over the weekend! -OMG! Details! -So, what had happened was, I invited this kid to a family party at my house… -Really? No invite, I see you-.- anyways continue -It was on Saturday and you had plans so stop catching feelings -____- anyways so I invited him as my friend, not as my boyfriend so he can meet my dad without the awkwardness. THAT PLAN WAS AN EPIC FRIGGIN FAIL!!!!! -What happened!!!!!!! -in the beginning things were smooth. My dad interrogated the hell out of him but, I told him he was just a homie and nothing more, he bought it for a little. -He found out?!?!?!?!? -YES!!! In the worse way too x( -How!? -tell me how we played it off mad clean, and then this kid had to leave so I walked him out. We’re standing on my front porch saying our goodbyes and he gave me my goodbye kiss -that’s it? o.O -No, no. the kiss turned into a mini make out and my dad opened the door and just stared us down, I pushed this kid away and ended up pushing him too hard and he feel down my porch stairs and his wrist is broken>.<….. -Holy freaking crap. You’re heartless, uyyyy big tough girl ;D you make out with em just to break his wrist…feisty one you are xD -I’m not even playing, I feel so bad! Not only did my dad find out about my secret love life, I managed to break this kid’s wrist, I should die-.- -you really should, that’s an o.d mess up. No coming back from that :p -Sheesh what a good friend you are-.- I feel terrible and he’s still with me :O -Idk how he’s still with ya clumsy self, you got a good one this time :D how’d your dad reaction though!? -ohhh yeah he’s pretty heated cuz I didn’t tell em whats up and lied to him… he said this kid was lucky he fell and broke his wrist before he did-.- -LMFAO!! That’s funny! Papa bear making sure his baby bear is safe x’D -shuddup you’re corny as hell, take a seat. I regret lying though, it was retarded -imma comical genius! >:D -anywas the bell is about to ring, you keep this note. DON’T LOSE IT -kay w.e wrist breaker xP -ewwwk bye then, text me though
Sandy, I have something that I have to tell you. It is both shocking, and somehow romantic. I was at my cousins’ house where I thought I would have a time to hang out with them, and just have fun. It turns out that they had a prank planned for me, which wasn’t funny. They embarrassed me in front of some hot guy at the mall. Him and I were talking when my one cousin walks up to us and started singing off key. It sounded like a dying walrus. Then, my other cousin started telling the guy I listened to Justin Bieber. He goes “So I heard you listened to Justin Bieber, he sure knows how to rock. Don’t you have all his albums and posters all over your room?” it was really embarrassing, and it wasn’t even true! You can’t tell anyone what I’m about to tell you next. Yes, I know where Mr. Andell lives; he is the hottest teacher I know. I followed him home one day, just to see where he is. Only 20 minutes away! Anyway, after school Friday, I followed him home, and sat in my car, watching him through his living room window. Just watching him made me feel somehow closer to him. I have finally found the love of my life :D I fantasize about Mr. Andell a lot, and sometimes wish I could marry him. That way, he will be all mine! You are the only person who knows about what I do, and my personal life. If any other person finds out, I would never be able to show my face in school or any other place as long as I live. Something else that I have to tell you is that Mr. Andell gave me a ride home the other day from school. I wanted to lean over and kiss him goodbye. He gave me a ride home because I was walking in the rain, and he was driving past me, and he noticed my umbrella from a mile away. You know what I’m talking about? The bright purple one with the neon stripes? Anyway he noticed and asked if I wanted a ride, and I happily agreed. What I said before was a lie; I actually kissed Mr. Andell on the cheek and got out of his car quicker than a bat outta Hell. I’m in love, and that’s all there is to it. Well, I’m going to make like Tom and Cruise. Regards, Emily:)
Well you know how I told you who I liked. Well I think that we have a problem. Um we have some problems. Well yes I was brave enough that I told him how I truly felt about him. So when I went up to him I felt dizzy and I had to hold onto him. I was feeling like the world was spinning and I fell on top of him. Both of us went crashing to the floor. When I looked into his eyes I felt as if I was going to throw up. He giggled and I got really nervous. So when he helped me get up I was feeling so much better from my dizzy self. I once again looked at him and threw up all over his shoes. I looked into his eyes and smiles and slowly wiped away my face hoping that he didn’t notice. He looked at me in complete anger this time and I didn’t know why. I didn’t do anything bad to give him the intention to give me a face. So he wanted to be a drama queen so I slapped him across the face and kissed him then walked away. While I walked away I could hear the noise of him throwing up. I wonder why? Well I’m sorry I got over him I never knew how mean he could be. I always thought he was nice but know I see how mean he could be. I don’t want to know anything about him anymore. Well now I found out how nice of a person you are. I also found out how attractive you are. I love the way you strut down the hallway. I will just stare at you. I have always had a little crush on you. I always stare at you when you go to your locker. Whenever you go to the bathroom in another class I will look up at the clock and see how long you are gone. I’m very sorry about how you will get accused by girls for not answering them. Let’s just say that your company doesn’t do a good job of girl’s text messages coming. I’m very privileged that mine are the only text messages that you get from girls. Now I’m going to tell you that this must be a sign showing that we are meant for each other. I know that you will not regret being with me. I PROMISE. We are meant for each other and nobody else. It’s funny how life always makes your ex-girlfriends disappear out of nowhere. Look on the bright side that I will be here for you at all times. I’m so happy I found out what type of guy he is and I’m done with him. No I’m all yours, aren’t you LUCKY. Well bye my love talk to you later. You better be thinking about me forever. When I mean forever I mean like every second of every minute of every day. If I find out that you’re not thinking about me you will regret it, I PROMISE. Bye again my love.
December 09, 2012 Minnie- Hey girl what’s up? Fernanda- Nothing much, OMG this class is so boring! Minnie- Remember when we were at the party and your crush was there with another girl? Fernanda- Don’t remind me that was the worst moment ever, I thought that Josh and I had a thing Minnie- LOL! I thought the same thing xD ha-ha just kidding. Fernanda- I really thought so ever since that moment he talked to me in class Minnie- He just said hi -.- Fernanda- So what, I don’t care you could tell there was something there. Minnie- To be honest, you’re dumb. Fernanda- Shut up! You know I’m smart. Minnie- Yeah sure, so is that all that happened between you guys Fernanda- He kissed me Minnie- No he didn’t, liar. Fernanda- Yes he did in my dream, ah I swear I think I love this guy. Minnie- He doesn’t even know you Fernanda- He will someday trust me but he knows me a little bit. Minnie- He doesn’t even know your name, omg just wake up dummy. Fernanda- He is the cutest guy ever; I think we will have kids together like right after high school. Minnie- Okay bye you’re getting really annoying with this. December 10, 2012 Fernanda- Girl, we need to talk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Minnie- What?! Fernanda- Oh Em Gee, I was walking home yesterday and I saw him with his friend going into his house. Minnie- Okay, sooooo what about it? Fernanda- I know where he lives now duh! Minnie- Creep much? Fernanda- At least I have a man Minnie- -.- I don’t want one and you know why Fernanda- yeah sure whatever so yeah I followed them to the park and I saw him and that girl Vanessa that was with him at the party, do you remember her? Minnie- Oh yeah of course I do, they looked so cute together. Fernanda- No they didn’t she’s ugly. Alright, now guess what happened Minnie- I don’t know, you tell me you were the one that was there right! Fernanda- Okay Ms. Attitude, well they were there for a little bit playing soccer together and then he walked her home. I followed them for a little bit but then it was getting dark so I decided to go home. Once I got home I went on Facebook to see if I could find her and I did but before sending her a friend request I made a fake profile with a different name, I sent her a message with that fake profile and I told her to stay away from Josh because he had a girlfriend and that they were going out for three years. Aren’t I a genius? Minnie- Why would you do that? That’s pathetic. Bye!
Dear Nessa, Hey, I’m writing this note to you because I’m bored in class. Let’s see we have so many memories together and I don’t know where to start. Remember the time that we were at the mall and you thought that you saw your brother and his girlfriend and you ran up to them and hug them, and it turned out to be random strangers. Also that sleepover we had when you were laughing so much that you peed your pants three times. The funniest memory we had was when you thought you saw your boyfriend with another girl and you started yelling and him for ten minutes till you realized it wasn’t him. Or that time you thought you saw your boyfriend and you just ran up to him and kissed him, and it wasn’t him. You felt so awkward and had no idea what to say. That time we were walking to the store at night and we were hyper singing our theme song and you tripped and fell on your face in front of a busy road, and other people were walking on the other side of the road and they started laughing. You had so many embarrassing moments. I remember when I was walking in the hallway during school and I just held some random persons hand thinking it was yours. Also the time I was eating and I missed my mouth and the food fell on my lap. My pants were dirty all day so I had to cover it up with my books, I was walking so awkwardly. Also that time I was drinking water from the fountain after gym and it got all on my pants and it lasted for half of the day. That time we were both sick and sneezed on each other. The time you were eating weird because you just got your braces off and someone was just starting at you eat and you didn’t know it till you were done eating and they were just sitting there laughing at you. We had some crazy, weird, awkward, funny moments within the past couple years and many more to come. We haven’t been friends for a long amount of time but, I feel like were more than were friends I feel like were sisters, we have been through almost everything together. We are always there for each other in our moments of need, I am happy to call you my friend. From, Jocy
Dear Eric, I know you maybe don’t notice me that much, but I see you all the time. I wanted to tell you this in person, but I’m just way too scared. I’ve had this crush on you since 6th grade and it’s been eating me alive. Every time I see you with a girl I feel like I die a little inside. Those other girls don’t deserve you. I’m the only person that would never hurt you. I’m the only one that looks out for your safety. I’m the only one who has cared about you from the start. Why won’t you pick me? I wonder sometimes if you even know my name. I mean I know everything about you, like how you watch old fashion cartoons on the weekends and how you want to become an artist. I know that you have a secret love for animals and hate golf. I also know that when you sleep your eyes flutter when you have a good dream and you snore louder when you have a nightmare. I swear on my life I think that we’re meant to be soul mates like Romeo and Juliet. I would definitely die for you; I would do it without a second thought. I have dreams about you every night and I have your name written across my bedroom walls. I even named my dog after you and all my passwords are your whole name, Eric David Anderson. Such a beautiful name I think we should name our kids after you. Maybe our wedding could be beach themed and I could wear a pale yellow dress since that’s your favorite color. And you could wear a black tux with a light blue tie to match your eyes. I kind of consider myself your guardian angel. I’m like your own personal body guard that you never knew about. Every time a girl broke your heart I was always there to break something of hers. Did you ever wonder why two days after Ashley broke up with you she had a broken foot? Or why Becky’s arm was broken the day after she slapped you at the park? Did you even question how Kaitlin’s car spontaneously combusted in the parking lot an hour after she admitted to cheating on you? Well it was all me your wonderful guardian angel. I will always be looking out for you. Just a word of advice you shouldn’t sleep with your window open someone could sneak in. By the way I love your drawings. You know the ones that are hidden in the top left drawer of your nightstand. I don’t really like that you painted your guitar green I liked it better when it was white. Your whole house is actually very comfortable, but you guys need to stock up on more cereal you always run out of my favorite kind. Maybe one day my dog and your dog could have a play date. Eric loves to meet other dogs she’s a social butterfly. Okay my love I must go, but hopefully one day you’ll notice me and the hidden love that lies in your heart will come out. We could live together forever and move far away from this town. Goodbye My Sweet From, Your Angel ;)
So, remember what I had to tell you yesterday but we had a fire drill, right when I was about to tell you the story? Basically, you know how you think I have that little “crush” on Eric? Well I think he knows! I’m not saying I do, but any chances I had of him liking me are completely RUINED! I would text you, but it’s easier to write you a note because I don’t want to get caught using my phone. You know how Ms. Hunter is -_- ! Anyways, you know how him and I have Math together? Well Mr. Williams called on me to read and I wasn’t paying attention! Melanie and I were passing notes back and forth about him! By the way, I think we should give the people we talk about code names, just in case our notes ever get found! So you know how Mr. Williams is a JERK RIGHT?! He comes over to my desk, sees that I don’t even have my packet out to read the problem, but he saw the note between me and Melanie. While I was starting to take out my packet, he snatched the note off my desk and READ THE NOTES OUT LOUD! I WAS SO EMBARASSED! I literally ran out of the classroom and never came back after that. I mean I can’t avoid the class forever, but Melanie told me she looked at Eric and he was like, “Who is that girl? I don’t even know her, this is awkward.” I’ve seen him since then, but I haven’t even looked at him in his face! Melanie said all of his friends were in the back laughing and pointing at him. He didn’t even know my name! I literally feel like my life is over, and school just started! It’s going to be a LONG YEAR Kris! WRITE BACK AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
P.S – Put the note in my locker, my combination is 45-23-12 :) Sincerely, G.
Dear diary, It’s September 5th 1985 and it’s my first day of high school. I couldn’t decide between the overalls or the bell bottom pants today because I was so excited. I did wear my awesome flannel shirt though. The chicks tell me it looks good on my biceps so I knew I had to whip this baby out for the New Year. I was really nervous though walking into to school because the big bad seniors always pick on a freshman the first day and I didn’t want to make myself a target for them. I know I will be at some point this year but I’m going to postpone it as long as possible. I heard they gave a kid a swirly as soon as he walked through the door last year. I’m not trying to give myself the same fate. Also they stick to the good ole paddle. My brother who graduated one year before me said that it was his weapon of choice to haze the freshman. He said he used it hundreds of times on the freshman. He even named his paddle after one of the freshman because he got him so many times with it. I was considering joining the football team this year because I had a sick throwing arm in Pop Warner. In Pop Warner I was on the Terrible Trojans. But, I kept turning the ball over and this kid Jim Jebow was always second string so all the parents wanted him to start playing quarterback instead of me. I hope that’s the last time I ever have to worry about an instance like that. If somebody had ever found this note I would be finished. I’m sure I would be the target for not only my entire freshman year but also my whole high school career. I would be never endingly terrorized and I would probably have to switch schools. I really hope that doesn’t happen because I really want to become a Jet, that’s the school mascot. I always thought it was kind of stupid to have an airplane as your mascot but I guess there’s nothing I can do about it if it comes to that.
Hey Hey Soooo I have something to tell you Yeah?..... But you have to promise not to tell anyone!! Okay I real honest pinky promise I wont tell anyone! Now just tell me! Okay sooo its not about me but one of our friends did something on Friday night at Alex’s party.. WHO. WAS. IT. Well first of all a lot of messed up crap went down at that party! But anyways, Danielle like hooked up with someone. So? What’s the big deal about that? It was someone elses BOYFRIEND! Oh hot damn! No she did not! Who did she hook up with? She hooked up with Mike.. Chloe’s boyfriend. Whoa Chloe? As in our Chloe? As in our best friend Chloe? As in her best friend Chloe too?!!!!!! YES!!! What the hell are we suppose to do?! I don’t know! Me neither! Like I don’t know what to do! I want to tell Chloe but I also don’t want to screw Danielle over… You know what I mean?... Yeah I agree.. I honestly don’t know what we should do.. wait! First of all how did this happen? Wellll, first Danielle and I got to the party and we had a drink or two and then she saw Mike and so she like went over to say hi or whatever and I went to where Jason was with a group of people and chilled over there. Then after a while I got curious as to where Danielle was so I looked aroung and then I found her on the couch practically ON TOP OF MIKE!!!!! Holy crap, what the hell do we do?! This is not good! Well talk after school the bell is about to ring
Hey =) Hi. Sup? Nm. I don’t like this class very much haha =) Me neither I don’t even understand what we are doing! Maybe you should try paying attention then instead of passing notes to me. Are you saying you don’t like our conversations!..xx;) Yeah. Oh… well… I think you’re hot! ;) Oh… thanks? Do you think I’m hot? Um… well… It’s a simple yes or no question. Doesn’t need much thinking! Well, you see… I’m gay. But you just broke up with your girlfriend. Yeah, she was just a cover. I’m sorry. But don’t go around telling people that I’m gay because you are the only one who knows. Are you afraid of telling people? No. I just decided lately that I am gay. I thought that people who are gay just know all their life. They have that little spark in them… well at least that’s what my ex-boyfriend told me. He said that he always knew but he just needed to be with a girl to confirm his feelings. Wait, Jason is gay? That’s what he told me… But he has a girlfriend now. He is not gay. Yes he is. How can you tell me that Jason is not gay? He told me he was! Maybe he was just trying to find an excuse to just break up with you No. Jason would never do that to me! We loved each other! We would have lasted forever if it was not for his… lack of interest in woman. No. You two broke up because Jason cheated on you… with the girl he is dating now. What are you talking about! Amber, stop acting like you don’t know what Jason did. Jason loved me! He would have never cheated on me! I gave everything to him! Are you really this stupid? Maybe you should date him because you two are both gay. Jason. Is. Not. Gay. And neither am I. But you just said you were gay… No. I just don’t want you to talk to you… but now since you are already confused about you’re not gay ex-boyfriend… I figure I should probably be straight with you. So will you go out with me? No. But why not?! Because you are three years younger then me, I have a girlfriend and you are completely insane! No I am not! You believe that Jason still loves you… when he doesn’t.
Days like these rant I’m sure everyone has days like these. The ones where all you want to do is lay in bed and scream into your pillow. The days where you just sit there and really think about life and what you’re doing or going with yours. Not everyone can be perfect all the time we catch each other slipping all the time because were only human. Those days where everything runs through your mind. Where is the love? Everyone hates each other now a day. The girls who were best friends all through middle school don’t even look at each other in high school. Things just aren’t the same. We all want to go back to the days where we were worried about if we could play outside today or not? Not if I’m skinnier then her or prettier than her. None of this matters the weight of the world seems like it’s on your shoulders but so does the guy sitting next to you. We have one life to live. Only one time to make the best out of it, we only have one time to do it. We have to stay strong, even though were just kids. Were just kids trying to get through this sucky generation and time in society that no one quiet understands? We try to get through things on our own but let’s be realistic, we can’t do it on our own we all need someone to talk to and lean on once in a while. Even though we “hate” each other, we need to get over it we grew up together and at one point we might need each other. Some people have friend ships that have lasted ten years and have never had a fight. Then there are those friends who jump around friend groups some say it’s because they’re fake, but grow up. We are all kids and have a lot more in common then we realize.
At age sixteen my mother became pregnant. She made a mistake that changed her life forever, but she didn’t let it hold her back. My mother worked hard to make a good life for herself and for me. She raised a baby with no help from my father and with very little help from her family. She got a job, and she studied hard. She was class valedictorian and held me in her arms while she gave her speech. She went to college and got an apartment. All of these things she did while raising me, and raising me well. My mother never made me feel like a mistake. She always told me that I was a blessing, and that I didn’t make her life difficult, I simply made her stronger. For a long time my mother stayed alone. She stayed single in hopes to protect me. But when I was seven years old my mother found a man she couldn’t say no to. In the summer of 2019 she married Nick Brown. My mother couldn’t have chosen a better man to help raise me. From the time I was seven, until the day he died at age seventy-one, I knew that man as my father. Nicole found true love and a man to raise me when she met Nick. She was a loving wife to him, and together they raised me in a happy and caring home. Because of my mother, I know that nothing in this world can keep you from getting what you want out of life.
Gathus looked him up and down as he started to walk a bit faster, trying to pass him. “You’re insane.” Eurlus smiled. “It took you this long to catch on, huh?”
Night fell over the city while Gathus was patrolling the streets. Even though he and Eurlus had told the king about the recklessness of the mercenaries he’d hired, apparently there was no one close enough to completing basic to make them into official guards. Eurlus had volunteered to take over the training and had ecided to give everyone a crash course to get them into armor as soon as possible, so he couldn’t go with Gathus on his patrol. He’d adamantly refused to patrol alongside the mercs, and although the king had respected this, he made it clear that there would be other patrols. Gathus strolled down the streets of Curvisca, looking from alley to alley, making sure everything was sound. His knuckles were white as he gripped his sword tightly. He had to admit, his body may be healing, but his mind mirrors his scarred face. Every glance down an alley, every reflection in a window, nearly anything in sight makes Gathus’ mind jump back to his dream. The man in the mask was on his mind this time, he felt like he’d seen it before. He looked at the ground and furrowed his brow as he thought. It couldn’t have been the man at the party. Could it? No, the man’s mask in his dream had had its mouth broken off. The one at the party had a full mask. He snapped out of his trance and realized there wasn’t any more cobblestone under his feet, just dirt. Shit, how far out of the city had he gone? Was he really zoning out for that long? Gathus looked around for a landmark but didn’t see anything but a small farm up ahead. He was about to turn back around and go back to the city when he saw a glint of light come from the farm
Hey, Suzie. You don’t have an extra pair of pants in your locker do you? I kinda… had an accident. I know, it’s so embarrassing but it must have been the bean burrito I ate at lunch. I just, I couldn’t hold it in anymore! Mr. Ferrino would not let me go to the bathroom. And to think I thought he was hot. Doesn’t he understand I’m a girl? Like, I have girl problems sometimes. Oh my god but don’t tell anyone I said that about him. But I guess now he’s has to face the consequences ‘cause this SMELLS. I hope nobody else smells it though. Really, Suzie, I need to get some pants or a skirt or something. This isn’t even a little bit okay. I can’t let my mom know this happened! She’ll probably find out, though, since she bathes me every night. I try to tell her that I’m 17 and I don’t need my mother to wash me anymore. I think I’m perfectly capable of it myself. Imagine if everyone at school found out? She still won’t even let me shave my arm pits. I am not her little girl anymore!! I want to be able to wear tank tops, but everyone will think I’m a man. What if I ever get to hook up with Jonny like I want? He’ll have his hands on me and then suddenly he’ll feel a small, scruffy animal coming out from under my arms. Oh my god that can never happen. But he’s sooooooooooooo hot. I would do anything for him. I would cut his toenails for him if he wanted me to. And maybe I’d get lucky and I could keep them. Do you think I can clone someone from their toenail clippings? Maybe he’d try to clone me from my armpit hair. But that would never happen. He probably would never want to come near me. I don’t even smell like a girl. I have to use men’s deodorant to de-stink my monstrously hairy pits. Anyway, hit me up with those pants, girl. I’m never going to attract Jonny smelling like a dirty, bean burrito-eating baby’s diaper. Like, this is worse than that time that kid had an accident on the way home from the school trip. This is some serious stuff. I just wish Mr. Hotty would let me get to the toilet!
This class is so boring Ya I fall asleep like everyday Me too it’s terrible So what happened this weekend? A lot of stuff Like what? Well we were out with the usual people and we were trying to find somewhere to hang out and get hammered and we heard about a party in the next town over and we heard it was going to be crazy with like over a hundred people and we had to see if it was true or not, so we showed up around 9 with like 20 people and there was only 3 other people there and it was completely dead and we were like the only people there. And on top of that there were no bitches to try to hook up with. So we weren’t havein that so we heard about another party in town that was like 15 mins away and that there were a lot of females there that were ready to hook up. When we got to the house there had to be like 100 hundred people in his house and a lot of them were girls. The party was already rockin when we walked in and we just joined right in. We were alittle behind everyone so we had so catching up to do. It took me about half an hour to catch up to where everyone else was at. That’s when I started to talk to girls from other towns. A lot of girls were really hot and I was trying hook up with them. After an hour I finally found one girl who was mad chill. We were talking for a while and then her boyfriend who was jacked and big as hell came over and tried to fight me cause I was talking to his girl and he went to swing on me and I flinched and then everyone got quite around me and started laughing because the guy scared me so bad I pooped my pants and I ran out of the house before it got any worse. It was a rough end to the night
you would not beleive what i did today today i just did a really really terrible thing and i did it at my job at mcdonalds i ate a customers order i don't what came over me i was just so hungry and i couldn't beleive what i did im sorry boss i wrote this letter because i couldn't tell face to face i just thought that you would judge for this incident i didn't eat all day and i was just so dang hungry it was killing me so i did what i had to do to survive oh by the way it was a angus bacon and cheese it was so good i just told the guy that we ran out of meat and fries he order the meal large it was so tasty i thought no one would notice it was late and he was going through the drive thru and it was just iressistable that burger was it even talked tome it was saying eat me now eat me now eat me now eat me now ahhhhhhhh i can still hear the voices so far they're eating me alive it's so hurtful to think because that's all i can think about when i try to thinkl about something else also it said that all of my employees were the devil and saying that i should fire all of you it also wanted to date me but i said no at first but then i fell in love with it it's so sweet when it talks to me it's gentle and funny even to so when you all get this letter i will be in a insane asylum or ran away with my true and i did both but the burger didnot make it was eatin by someone in the insane asylum he was in a straight jacket and bit it i was hurt i cried for two and a half days but im over it now that it's went into burger heaven anyway i'll see you probably never any it was my pleasure servin you all the manager dan
ps do not tell the fries and burger i cheated on them with the burger
You probably don’t know who I am, but I’ve watched you wander the hallways many times in between classes. I’ve even memorized every route of your schedule. Sometimes, I can’t help but stand outside the classroom door and just gaze at you. I can’t help but think of how beautiful your long brown hair is when you wear it down your back. When I look into your dark brown eyes, I see my whole future, and even my unborn children. Whenever I hear your amazing singing voice, it leaves me completely captivated. You are the only reason why I go to the choir concert every year. When you graduate, I’ll probably never go to a concert again. Every day, I follow you home and I think to myself, “If only she knew I existed. Do yu remember the person who rang your doorbell yesterday? Your mother answered and I pretended to be a Jahova Witness, handing out a panphlet I made myself. When your mother said she wasn’t interested, I let myself in and asked if she had a daughter. She said it was none of my concern, but I heard your music blasting from your bedroom. It was the Beatles’ “And I love Her,” I remember. I could have just gone up there and confessed my love to you, but your father dragged me out and called the police. Yes, that was me in your house last night. I just couldn’t help myself, So, if you are reading this, and you want to get to know me, here’s my number: 555-555-5555. So call me maybe, and we shal continue from there.
love, Your secret admirer/stalker
P.S. I figured out the one and only password you use for every website. “Music” was so obvious. Yes, I know you better than you think I do. And at least I admitted I was a stalker.
Hey buddy! I know that we are not supposed to be passing around notes in class but I have something to tell you and it cannot wait! So after school yesterday, I was walking home as usual. As I was walking, I had the most amazing daydream! I don’t just mean some boring thought that appears randomly, especially when your head is filled with like a gazillion thoughts. No, I am talking about a stroke of genius! I know that when most people daydream it is about trivial things, like their crush or what they are going to wear tomorrow. For me, it is completely different! As you already know, pretty much all I ever think about is school, school and more school! What can I say? School is pretty much my life and that may sound pathetic to most people, but I think it is actually a very practical way to spend my time. Anyway, about the daydream! So you know how we have to do a math project for geometry class? I was thinking about making a dodecahedron! The idea just came to me! I think I remembered it from a mathematician book I read last summer. You know I have a photographic memory and can remember practically anything, so I feel like that is where this awesome idea came from. I suppose you are wondering what a dodecahedron is. Well I could babble for hours about it and explain its precise shape, angles, vertices, side lengths… see? Here I go again. A simple definition is a three-dimensional shape that has twelve faces in the shape of pentagons. I know that I can construct a replica out of poster board and I can also include a report on how to formulate and calculate its surface area and its volume. This will be so exciting! I cannot wait to do it! I do realize that the project is not due for another month but I just love homework so much that I am going to start and finish it today. Oh and also, I can’t wait for that chemistry test tomorrow! I know it is going to be a super exam! And don’t forget the English essay that is due on Friday. Mine is already ten pages long and it is not even done yet! I must sound like the biggest nerd in the world. If anyone ever found this note, I would indefinitely be in for many embarrassing encounters at school! Anyways, that was all that I wanted to tell you. Oh and remember to hand in your homework at the end of this period!
Dear Nathan, Since the first day I move here, I’ve been in love with you. Maybe you don’t remember, but I still remember the moment where you lend me the pencil in first grade. I still have it with me. It holds my precious memory with you, even though it was for less than a minute. I still remember your blue crystal eyes and your brown dotted freckles around your nose. It’s been nine years since then. Every single night, I would always kiss the pencil before I got to sleep. Also, I was your secret admirer who always put chocolate inside your backpack during Valentine’s Day. I would follow you home every day, to make sure that no one attacks you. There was this one time, where a creep was following you for almost a week, and when I noticed this, I called the police on him before he could do anything. Nowadays, you are always surrounded by popular, pretty girls, and I can only look at you behind the corners. Though, my phone has been filled up with your pictures. I took them while I was hiding. There are pictures of you in gym, when you are half naked, and one when you are kissing your first girlfriend. It was so hard to watch you kiss her, so to forever remember that day; I decided to take a picture. It might be hard for me, but it was a good day for you. You had your first girlfriend, but it wasn’t your first kiss. I stole your first kiss while you were lying on the table, sleeping, in the library. I know it is unfair for you to not know, but it is better that way. You remember how I told you I move here in first grade? Well, the reason I move here is not because of my parent’s job. My parents aren’t even with me right now. They are at another state. I moved to Connecticut alone, to live with my grandparents. The reason I move to here is because I did something embarrassing in front of my whole school back then. There was a mini debate between each of the homerooms of each grade. Everyone in town came because the debate included first through twelve graders. It was a big tradition of that town to hold a debate between each grade. All the parents came, the police came, and even the town mayor came. Anyway, the first graders had to debate about a conflict in a story they read, and I had to make a conclusion speech and I was extremely nervous. There were butterflies in my stomach and to calm myself down, I drank a lot of water. When it was nearly my turn, I started to feel the urge to go to the bathroom. I tried to hold it until after the debate, but I didn’t work. I peed myself in front of the whole school, and everyone saw, including my parents. The teachers quickly took me off stage and my parent came to clean me up. It was so embarrassing, so I decided to fake sick and not go to school the next day, my parent obviously knew, but they understood me and gave me time. Though, this went on for weeks. My dad said that I had to go to school, but he said that I could change school if I want to. This is how I ended up here. I don’t regret coming here because I met you. You are the prince of my life and I will love you forever, even if you don’t even know my existence. I will continue watching over you, following you home, and taking pictures to record your life-long timeline. Your dearly, Herga Zhang
Dear Rihanna, I have known you since 5th grade. I always had a crush on you but I don’t know how to tell you. I’m too scared to go up to you and even say hi. You’re just beautiful and I know you not want to be with a geek like me. I hope I was like the other kids so I can go up to you and say hi. Your hair is so long and looks smooth not like I touched it but I want to, I would love to. You don’t want to be with a boy like me you want a pretty boy like Chris brown. I follow you home and I just like to look at you. In lunch I sit by myself but you sit across the room from me and I just love to watch you eat. Your lips are so big and juicy. When I walk home I walk so fast because I have pictures of you on my wall, and I just can’t wait to just watch you. Sometimes I go to the bathroom and I masturbate to your pictures. You just look so good Rihanna and I want you so bad. I like you and you don’t like me so what should I do? Nothing ill just wait till I get my chance and I’ll make you mine. Well there you is sitting in my English class sleeping like always and I just love to look at you. Now I’m going to throw this note in the trash can because I wrote this when I was bored. (Someone from school found the note next to the trash can and picked it up. The same day he wrote it and they knew it was that geeky kid that always sat alone, and they made fun of him all throughout the year. The kid was made fun of, but at the end of the year Rihanna went up to Ahmed the geek and she asked him out. And he lived happily ever after) the note embarrassed him but at the end he became a happy man.
To my boy ugly, First of let me start of by saying you is one ugly ass dude. But im about bored as hell in the freaking class dog. This teacher just talks and talks my g I got nothing else to do but look at Monica and you know she about gorgeous as hell. You should of seen nick do the ugliest face in the planet. So it goes like this we was just chilling in class when nick just walks up to us does the ugly face and tries to talk to Monica when he been did his ugly face. Monica just looked at him and started laughing ha-ha. But yoo ugly I think im in love bro with this girl Monica like when I be staring at her in class she be looking at me back with the face of “ why you’re looking at me but I like it” type of faces bro she just sexy as hell. It’s like I would go out with her but I don’t know cuz I heard stuff about her and that she aint what it seems like you feel me and you know me bro I love to go out a lot and just have a banging ass time. Remember that time when we went to the party in 4th street and we just started bugging the freak out that was the most craziest night ever and your dumb butt busted your ass so hard ha-ha. Dumb those were good time’s man im going to miss you when you leave but things aren’t meant to be and im talking about me and Monica.
I TOLD YOU NOT TO SAY ANYTHING! I can’t believe you told Chad that I was the one who got food poisoning from Friday night! How is he supposed to ask me to prom if all he can think about is me puking all over his carpet?! Ugh, this will never do. He’s the hottest senior is school—the rest of the upperclassmen guys better not really hear about this! I really trusted you, Tiff! Now, he won’t even look at me—he probably thinks I’m gross!
Oh, and speaking of gross—did you see Hannah’s dress today? Yuck! I thought the 1900s was like one million years ago! And her hair? Disgusting! My grandma had that hairstyle like when she was born! I wish people could be more fashionable in this school like me. And oh, speaking of me, Brian totally was staring at me today in math class. Then, he winked at me and told me he liked my outfit, but I just turned away because everyone knows Brian Brown totally tooted in fourth grade! Gross! Only mature guys can talk to me . . . like Chad. Chad Thompson—he’s so amazing—but if he never talks to me again, I’m totally blaming you, Tiff!
Oh, and speaking of talking, doesn’t Ms. Havenworth talk way too much? Like, she talks more than me! ME! I mean, the only thing is that when she walks, nobody wants to listen, but when I talk everyone does! I was in Italian today, and she was so annoying—I couldn’t understand a word she was saying—it was like she was speaking a completely different language or something! I mean, Italian is so easy but so confusing at the same time. Doesn’t “ciao” mean pretty or something? I don’t know—I’m just glad I’m American.
Oh, and speaking of American, we need to go shopping this weekend. My dad just gave me a new credit card after I maxed out the other one I had. It took a little bit of convincing though, but I stole his car and blamed it on my brother—that distracted him. Anyways, we have to go to like every store in the mall. Every single one. Tiff, you can hold my bags again once I don’t feel like holding them anymore. We’re going to have so much fun! Can’t wait!
P.S.: Make sure this note doesn’t drop in the hallway like it did last week again. How embarrassing!
"What's gucci for this weekend, bro?" "I don't know man, whatever the gucci God brings us, you know?" "True dat. Let me tell you about this dream I had, it was so trippy." "Alright, go ahead." "So, it starts off with me at my job. I'm just chilling, minding my own business, when a giant wasp shows up. This isn't a normal wasp though." "What kind of wasp was it?" "A HUMAN wasp." "What is that supposed to mean...wtf?" "Like it was 6 feet tall, stood up on two feet and somehow held things with it's two stinger things." "Like a Beedrill?" "Yeah man, perfect interpretation." "Is that it?" "Nope, a lot more happened. So the wasp asks for a table for two, he was expecting a date. He was quite gentlemanly for being a wasp. Instead of sitting, he was sticking to the ceiling. My manager actually asked him to get down because he was creeping out the whole restaurant. The beedrill thing then did laser vision at him, to which my boss equipped a flamethrower and attacked him with it!" "This is insane." "I know, right. So then his date shows up and guess who it is." "Who?" "Godzilla, and she is one crazy bitch. She destroyed the whole restaurant trying to save her date from my boss. After the end of the attack, she stood, staring at me, charging her fire breath. I thought all was lost until my heroine showed up. Guess who THAT was." "I have no idea." "Our history teacher, dude. She was a giant and beat up Godzilla and squashed beedrill." "What happened then?" "Then she took ME out to dinner, paid for ME, and carried my around. I felt so emasculated." "I can see why lol." "Oh man, the teacher's coming now, don't send the note back." Dear Sean, I am very honored that I was the heroine in your dream. Despite this, I expect you to pay attention and talk about your fantasies and dreams with Tyler on your own time. That would definitely be more beneficial and maybe you wouldn't feel like such a woman. "I can't believe you let her take it." "My bad."
“Omg you would not believe what happened to me today! He. Looked. AT. ME. OMG I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO FAINT BUT HE LOOKED AT ME AND ASKED ME WHAT THE HOMEWORK WAS! AHHHH I know I know, this is pretty epic but I honestly couldn’t breathe for like a whole minute. He’s so hot and when he looked at me there was a light right behind his head, he looked like a Greek God! Oh dear lord I can’t even handle myself right now. But girl, this wasn’t just the first time he looked at me. The other time he was looking at me in physics for a good 7 seconds! He claims he was trying to see what time it was, but I don’t buy it. He definitely wants me. I hope he asks me to homecoming. CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT? I WOULDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF. I can picture it now. Him and I slow dancing, his hands on my waist, my hands on his broad muscular shoulders, him looking at me with his blue eyes, and him smiling at me telling me that I look beautiful tonight. THEN BAM. WE KISS. AHHHHH MELTING OVER HERE. OMG I CAN’T. Oh by the way, are you still talking to that kid? Because I heard he’s like into you haha GET IT GIRL. Oh and can I have the homework for college algebra? I don’t know what is going on in that class. It’s like he’s speaking another language. I don’t know why all the girls find him attractive, like he’s married and ew gross, no. Maybe it’s because he teaches the subject I hate the most, oh well. “
ReplyDeleteHey Jim, look man I got some bad news. I heard from a friend of a friend that your girlfriend is cheating on you with Bill. I’m sorry that I can’t tell this to your face, but this is the easiest way to do it. I went and confronted her about it and she said that she wasn’t sorry. She called you a cry baby backstabber, I don’t know what she could mean by that but whatever dude. Now that that’s out of the way I can’t hang out later, I’ve got to do work around the house and my parents say that they’ll take my car away if I don’t do it. Sorry about ruining your plans and telling you this bad news, I’ll talk to you later to we can sort this out
ReplyDeleteFrom
Jerry
Hey Jim its Bill, don’t believe that BS from Jerry, that’s all a lie. I found this note on the floor and read it, man that is the biggest load I’ve ever heard. Jerry stole your girl from under your nose, he’s been getting closer to her each day, I’m surprised that you didn’t notice it yet, the rest of the school has. My advice is that you should go and fight Jerry for what he did a true friend wouldn’t do that and anyone who would deserves a beating. If you want I’ll help out I’ve been needing a reason to hurt him ever since he stole my IPod, it wasn’t proven it was him but I just know that he stole it.
From
Bill
Jim Its Sarah, I’m sorry for not telling you that I’m leaving you but things just happened between me and Jerry. You shouldn’t hurt him he is a good guy, much better than you were by the way. I did say those things though, but only to Jerry not anyone else. Really I’m so sorry for this, I wanted this to work with us but things just didn’t go the way that I thought it would and then this happened. Please accept my apology and I hope we can still be friends. Oh and for some reason Bill if you do get this I have your IPod, Jerry did take it but he gave it to me, I’ll give it back to you next time I see you.
From
Sarah
To all you idiots, I don’t care about any of that. Jerry you’re a jerk for stealing my now ex-girlfriend but whatever you can have her, have fun with the crabs. Bill I don’t need to hurt him and by all means you can I won’t stop you. Sarah I was going to break up with you anyway, I’m moving to Canada so I’ll never see you again. You are all a bunch of morons, have fun together.
From
Jim
I just found this and wanted to say hi, so HI.
From
Anonymous
To the love of my life,
ReplyDeleteI have loved you since the day I laid my eye on you. I haven’t told anyone the real reason I only have one eye. I told everyone I was trying to stop a thief from stealing my mom’s purse. And then his assistant thief shot a rubber band into my left eye. Actually, the real story is, I was walking home and I tripped over my untied shoelace. I fell and there was a stick on the sidewalk that punctured my eye. Please don’t tell anyone and don’t laugh. It hurt a lot.
Well back to my huge crush on you. Since the day you walked into school in 2nd grade. You didn’t know anyone and you were always working alone. I was too shy to talk to you, even though I seemed to be the only one that wanted anything to do with you.
But now all the girls are all over you. And it seems like I don’t have a chance anymore. I should have taken the chance when I could. I’m still that girl that watches you from a distance, longing for the day when you notice me. But I guess you already have noticed my one-eye face. Unfortunately you didn’t view me the way I wanted you to.
Well I’m moving tomorrow. I just wanted to let you know my true feelings. Unfortunately I’m not the kind of person to go out and express myself. So you will never get this letter. Especially since you would know who wrote this since I’m the only girl with an eye patch.
So goodbye my crush of 10 years. I will most likely never see you again. I wish you the best and hope you find love. Something I will probably never find.
- Cecilia
PS- I was the one that wrote you that letter of having many babies with you. I also took your gym shirt so I could have a part of you. I still have it. I keep it in my purse. Oh and you know that kid that fell down the stairs back in September? Yeah I pushed him. So I could get to your class before you did so I could see you. Of course I get suspended for it. But I waited outside for you every day. I know it sounds creepy. But I love you. And I would do anything for you, like smell Egbert Peeboy so you don’t have to. Who’s Egbert you would ask? He’s my imaginary friend.
Wow I hope nobody finds this.
......This seemed normal until I read the PS part.....
DeleteDear Diary,
ReplyDeleteI am so cute! I know that EVERYBODY loves me! I just can’t help it; my face is just naturally like this. My golden curls are like beams of sunshine! They complement my blue eyes so well! Oh my gosh! I’m so pretty that I would marry myself if I could! Sigh…but that’s not possible. I don’t understand why the girls hate me. It’s not my fault that I’m prettier than them. However, I need to get some new outfits. Dad keeps throwing my beautiful dresses away! He even took away my hair ribbons! “You need to act normally,” he says. “You’re embarrassing me,” he says Humph. Well I’m not the kid he wants me to be. Dresses are the only things I like to wear! Aha! I know! I’ll ask Auntie! She always gives me her old dresses; but I got to watch out, last time she snuck in a T-shirt and jeans into the pile of dresses she gave me. Sigh. People just don’t understand me once they get to know me. The only one who does is Alexis! She’s my best friend in the whole world wide world. We exchange gossip and all of the latest fashion. She loves it when I help her do her hair. She says that my fashion sense is absolutely superb. We can talk about anything with each other. However, she gets a bit anxious whenever I start talking about boys. I can’t help it! They’re so handsome! Stupid, but handsome. I’m sure that there’s not one guy in my school who doesn’t like me. Well, except Alexis’s other best friend. He’s been avoiding me ever since he found out I am a guy. Well, so what? Guys can wear dresses! Right? I mean, they’re so cute! Especially ones with ribbons! Oh, and dresses that have matching purses! That’s just beyond amazing! I just hope that nobody realizes that I’m a guy. It’d be so embarrassing! I’ve managed to hide it by avoiding changing for gym and going to the bathroom in public. Sigh. At least I’d still have Alexis! Even though she is my sister... Oh well, the other girls aren’t my friends because they’re just jealous that a guy is cuter than them! I mean, just look at this fair skin, these crystal blue eyes, and these golden curls! Oh, wait. I forgot I don’t have a picture attached to this page so nobody can see what I look like. Eh, I’ll do it later; but now, it’s time to go to choir! I’m singing the soprano solo and I’m so excited! Hehe! I just need to put this in a safe place later. Geez, if anyone found this and learned that I was actually a guy, I’d be mortified!
Dear Sonnyboy,
ReplyDeleteHello, it’s your mother. I was just going to write you a little letter for today. I hope you don’t leave it anywhere or else I will spank you when you get home. I just wanted to let you know that you left your ointment at home this morning. You know you can’t leave it at home because if you don’t apply it every two hours you will get rashes all over your body. I hope you do that every day. I know you don’t have any problems with rashes but you can never be too careful. When you get home today I need to do a full body check for any lice and ticks that you might have gotten throughout the day. You know after the first time you got lice I was so scared for you.
I hope I packed you everything you wanted for lunch today. I accidently put in a yogurt so make sure you don’t eat that since you are Lactose intolerant. Remember if you have any bit of dairy the whole entire room will be cleared out in less than a minute. Your gas will come out of you like a waterfall.
I hope your diarrhea is going well. You felt really sick this morning so I hope you are feeling better. I am trying not to tell anyone that I found you this morning covered in your own vomit. It was really funny, I hope no one finds out because then everyone would laugh at my little sonnyboy and I would hate to see that. And if anyone does make fun of you make sure you tell your mommy so that I can that child a stern talking to. I will go to his own mother and say “Your sonnyboy was picking on my sonnyboy. You should reprimand him; give him a good spanking on the bottom like I give mine every night. That should set him straight.” Then he would never pick on you again. My precious little sonnyboy, I don’t know what I would do without you. You mean so much to me; I hope you never leave me, ever. And if you do I just might have a heart attack, so you won’t be getting married anytime soon. I hope you have a lovely day at school and remember you need to take a bath when you get home.
Love, Mother
-You won’t believe what happened to me over the weekend!
ReplyDelete-OMG! Details!
-So, what had happened was, I invited this kid to a family party at my house…
-Really? No invite, I see you-.- anyways continue
-It was on Saturday and you had plans so stop catching feelings -____- anyways so I invited him as my friend, not as my boyfriend so he can meet my dad without the awkwardness. THAT PLAN WAS AN EPIC FRIGGIN FAIL!!!!!
-What happened!!!!!!!
-in the beginning things were smooth. My dad interrogated the hell out of him but, I told him he was just a homie and nothing more, he bought it for a little.
-He found out?!?!?!?!?
-YES!!! In the worse way too x(
-How!?
-tell me how we played it off mad clean, and then this kid had to leave so I walked him out. We’re standing on my front porch saying our goodbyes and he gave me my goodbye kiss
-that’s it? o.O
-No, no. the kiss turned into a mini make out and my dad opened the door and just stared us down, I pushed this kid away and ended up pushing him too hard and he feel down my porch stairs and his wrist is broken>.<…..
-Holy freaking crap. You’re heartless, uyyyy big tough girl ;D you make out with em just to break his wrist…feisty one you are xD
-I’m not even playing, I feel so bad! Not only did my dad find out about my secret love life, I managed to break this kid’s wrist, I should die-.-
-you really should, that’s an o.d mess up. No coming back from that :p
-Sheesh what a good friend you are-.- I feel terrible and he’s still with me :O
-Idk how he’s still with ya clumsy self, you got a good one this time :D how’d your dad reaction though!?
-ohhh yeah he’s pretty heated cuz I didn’t tell em whats up and lied to him… he said this kid was lucky he fell and broke his wrist before he did-.-
-LMFAO!! That’s funny! Papa bear making sure his baby bear is safe x’D
-shuddup you’re corny as hell, take a seat. I regret lying though, it was retarded
-imma comical genius! >:D
-anywas the bell is about to ring, you keep this note. DON’T LOSE IT
-kay w.e wrist breaker xP
-ewwwk bye then, text me though
Sandy,
ReplyDeleteI have something that I have to tell you. It is both shocking, and somehow romantic. I was at my cousins’ house where I thought I would have a time to hang out with them, and just have fun. It turns out that they had a prank planned for me, which wasn’t funny. They embarrassed me in front of some hot guy at the mall. Him and I were talking when my one cousin walks up to us and started singing off key. It sounded like a dying walrus. Then, my other cousin started telling the guy I listened to Justin Bieber. He goes “So I heard you listened to Justin Bieber, he sure knows how to rock. Don’t you have all his albums and posters all over your room?” it was really embarrassing, and it wasn’t even true! You can’t tell anyone what I’m about to tell you next. Yes, I know where Mr. Andell lives; he is the hottest teacher I know. I followed him home one day, just to see where he is. Only 20 minutes away! Anyway, after school Friday, I followed him home, and sat in my car, watching him through his living room window. Just watching him made me feel somehow closer to him. I have finally found the love of my life :D I fantasize about Mr. Andell a lot, and sometimes wish I could marry him. That way, he will be all mine! You are the only person who knows about what I do, and my personal life. If any other person finds out, I would never be able to show my face in school or any other place as long as I live. Something else that I have to tell you is that Mr. Andell gave me a ride home the other day from school. I wanted to lean over and kiss him goodbye. He gave me a ride home because I was walking in the rain, and he was driving past me, and he noticed my umbrella from a mile away. You know what I’m talking about? The bright purple one with the neon stripes? Anyway he noticed and asked if I wanted a ride, and I happily agreed. What I said before was a lie; I actually kissed Mr. Andell on the cheek and got out of his car quicker than a bat outta Hell. I’m in love, and that’s all there is to it. Well, I’m going to make like Tom and Cruise.
Regards,
Emily:)
Dear Anthony,
ReplyDeleteWell you know how I told you who I liked. Well I think that we have a problem. Um we have some problems. Well yes I was brave enough that I told him how I truly felt about him. So when I went up to him I felt dizzy and I had to hold onto him. I was feeling like the world was spinning and I fell on top of him. Both of us went crashing to the floor. When I looked into his eyes I felt as if I was going to throw up. He giggled and I got really nervous. So when he helped me get up I was feeling so much better from my dizzy self. I once again looked at him and threw up all over his shoes. I looked into his eyes and smiles and slowly wiped away my face hoping that he didn’t notice. He looked at me in complete anger this time and I didn’t know why. I didn’t do anything bad to give him the intention to give me a face. So he wanted to be a drama queen so I slapped him across the face and kissed him then walked away. While I walked away I could hear the noise of him throwing up. I wonder why? Well I’m sorry I got over him I never knew how mean he could be. I always thought he was nice but know I see how mean he could be. I don’t want to know anything about him anymore. Well now I found out how nice of a person you are. I also found out how attractive you are. I love the way you strut down the hallway. I will just stare at you. I have always had a little crush on you. I always stare at you when you go to your locker. Whenever you go to the bathroom in another class I will look up at the clock and see how long you are gone. I’m very sorry about how you will get accused by girls for not answering them. Let’s just say that your company doesn’t do a good job of girl’s text messages coming. I’m very privileged that mine are the only text messages that you get from girls. Now I’m going to tell you that this must be a sign showing that we are meant for each other. I know that you will not regret being with me. I PROMISE. We are meant for each other and nobody else. It’s funny how life always makes your ex-girlfriends disappear out of nowhere. Look on the bright side that I will be here for you at all times. I’m so happy I found out what type of guy he is and I’m done with him. No I’m all yours, aren’t you LUCKY. Well bye my love talk to you later. You better be thinking about me forever. When I mean forever I mean like every second of every minute of every day. If I find out that you’re not thinking about me you will regret it, I PROMISE. Bye again my love.
Love,
Your future wife and mother of your kids
December 09, 2012
ReplyDeleteMinnie- Hey girl what’s up?
Fernanda- Nothing much, OMG this class is so boring!
Minnie- Remember when we were at the party and your crush was there with another girl?
Fernanda- Don’t remind me that was the worst moment ever, I thought that Josh and I had a thing
Minnie- LOL! I thought the same thing xD ha-ha just kidding.
Fernanda- I really thought so ever since that moment he talked to me in class
Minnie- He just said hi -.-
Fernanda- So what, I don’t care you could tell there was something there.
Minnie- To be honest, you’re dumb.
Fernanda- Shut up! You know I’m smart.
Minnie- Yeah sure, so is that all that happened between you guys
Fernanda- He kissed me
Minnie- No he didn’t, liar.
Fernanda- Yes he did in my dream, ah I swear I think I love this guy.
Minnie- He doesn’t even know you
Fernanda- He will someday trust me but he knows me a little bit.
Minnie- He doesn’t even know your name, omg just wake up dummy.
Fernanda- He is the cutest guy ever; I think we will have kids together like right after high school.
Minnie- Okay bye you’re getting really annoying with this.
December 10, 2012
Fernanda- Girl, we need to talk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Minnie- What?!
Fernanda- Oh Em Gee, I was walking home yesterday and I saw him with his friend going into his house.
Minnie- Okay, sooooo what about it?
Fernanda- I know where he lives now duh!
Minnie- Creep much?
Fernanda- At least I have a man
Minnie- -.- I don’t want one and you know why
Fernanda- yeah sure whatever so yeah I followed them to the park and I saw him and that girl Vanessa that was with him at the party, do you remember her?
Minnie- Oh yeah of course I do, they looked so cute together.
Fernanda- No they didn’t she’s ugly. Alright, now guess what happened
Minnie- I don’t know, you tell me you were the one that was there right!
Fernanda- Okay Ms. Attitude, well they were there for a little bit playing soccer together and then he walked her home. I followed them for a little bit but then it was getting dark so I decided to go home. Once I got home I went on Facebook to see if I could find her and I did but before sending her a friend request I made a fake profile with a different name, I sent her a message with that fake profile and I told her to stay away from Josh because he had a girlfriend and that they were going out for three years. Aren’t I a genius?
Minnie- Why would you do that? That’s pathetic. Bye!
Dear Nessa,
ReplyDeleteHey, I’m writing this note to you because I’m bored in class. Let’s see we have so many memories together and I don’t know where to start. Remember the time that we were at the mall and you thought that you saw your brother and his girlfriend and you ran up to them and hug them, and it turned out to be random strangers. Also that sleepover we had when you were laughing so much that you peed your pants three times. The funniest memory we had was when you thought you saw your boyfriend with another girl and you started yelling and him for ten minutes till you realized it wasn’t him. Or that time you thought you saw your boyfriend and you just ran up to him and kissed him, and it wasn’t him. You felt so awkward and had no idea what to say. That time we were walking to the store at night and we were hyper singing our theme song and you tripped and fell on your face in front of a busy road, and other people were walking on the other side of the road and they started laughing. You had so many embarrassing moments. I remember when I was walking in the hallway during school and I just held some random persons hand thinking it was yours. Also the time I was eating and I missed my mouth and the food fell on my lap. My pants were dirty all day so I had to cover it up with my books, I was walking so awkwardly. Also that time I was drinking water from the fountain after gym and it got all on my pants and it lasted for half of the day. That time we were both sick and sneezed on each other. The time you were eating weird because you just got your braces off and someone was just starting at you eat and you didn’t know it till you were done eating and they were just sitting there laughing at you. We had some crazy, weird, awkward, funny moments within the past couple years and many more to come. We haven’t been friends for a long amount of time but, I feel like were more than were friends I feel like were sisters, we have been through almost everything together. We are always there for each other in our moments of need, I am happy to call you my friend.
From,
Jocy
Dear Eric,
ReplyDeleteI know you maybe don’t notice me that much, but I see you all the time. I wanted to tell you this in person, but I’m just way too scared. I’ve had this crush on you since 6th grade and it’s been eating me alive. Every time I see you with a girl I feel like I die a little inside. Those other girls don’t deserve you. I’m the only person that would never hurt you. I’m the only one that looks out for your safety. I’m the only one who has cared about you from the start. Why won’t you pick me? I wonder sometimes if you even know my name. I mean I know everything about you, like how you watch old fashion cartoons on the weekends and how you want to become an artist. I know that you have a secret love for animals and hate golf. I also know that when you sleep your eyes flutter when you have a good dream and you snore louder when you have a nightmare. I swear on my life I think that we’re meant to be soul mates like Romeo and Juliet. I would definitely die for you; I would do it without a second thought. I have dreams about you every night and I have your name written across my bedroom walls. I even named my dog after you and all my passwords are your whole name, Eric David Anderson. Such a beautiful name I think we should name our kids after you. Maybe our wedding could be beach themed and I could wear a pale yellow dress since that’s your favorite color. And you could wear a black tux with a light blue tie to match your eyes. I kind of consider myself your guardian angel. I’m like your own personal body guard that you never knew about. Every time a girl broke your heart I was always there to break something of hers. Did you ever wonder why two days after Ashley broke up with you she had a broken foot? Or why Becky’s arm was broken the day after she slapped you at the park? Did you even question how Kaitlin’s car spontaneously combusted in the parking lot an hour after she admitted to cheating on you? Well it was all me your wonderful guardian angel. I will always be looking out for you. Just a word of advice you shouldn’t sleep with your window open someone could sneak in. By the way I love your drawings. You know the ones that are hidden in the top left drawer of your nightstand. I don’t really like that you painted your guitar green I liked it better when it was white. Your whole house is actually very comfortable, but you guys need to stock up on more cereal you always run out of my favorite kind. Maybe one day my dog and your dog could have a play date. Eric loves to meet other dogs she’s a social butterfly. Okay my love I must go, but hopefully one day you’ll notice me and the hidden love that lies in your heart will come out. We could live together forever and move far away from this town.
Goodbye My Sweet From,
Your Angel ;)
O.O This takes stalking to a whole new level.
DeleteSo, remember what I had to tell you yesterday but we had a fire drill, right when I was about to tell you the story? Basically, you know how you think I have that little “crush” on Eric? Well I think he knows! I’m not saying I do, but any chances I had of him liking me are completely RUINED! I would text you, but it’s easier to write you a note because I don’t want to get caught using my phone. You know how Ms. Hunter is -_- ! Anyways, you know how him and I have Math together? Well Mr. Williams called on me to read and I wasn’t paying attention! Melanie and I were passing notes back and forth about him! By the way, I think we should give the people we talk about code names, just in case our notes ever get found! So you know how Mr. Williams is a JERK RIGHT?! He comes over to my desk, sees that I don’t even have my packet out to read the problem, but he saw the note between me and Melanie. While I was starting to take out my packet, he snatched the note off my desk and READ THE NOTES OUT LOUD! I WAS SO EMBARASSED! I literally ran out of the classroom and never came back after that. I mean I can’t avoid the class forever, but Melanie told me she looked at Eric and he was like, “Who is that girl? I don’t even know her, this is awkward.” I’ve seen him since then, but I haven’t even looked at him in his face! Melanie said all of his friends were in the back laughing and pointing at him. He didn’t even know my name! I literally feel like my life is over, and school just started! It’s going to be a LONG YEAR Kris! WRITE BACK AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
ReplyDeleteP.S – Put the note in my locker, my combination is 45-23-12 :)
Sincerely, G.
Dear diary,
ReplyDeleteIt’s September 5th 1985 and it’s my first day of high school. I couldn’t decide between the overalls or the bell bottom pants today because I was so excited. I did wear my awesome flannel shirt though. The chicks tell me it looks good on my biceps so I knew I had to whip this baby out for the New Year. I was really nervous though walking into to school because the big bad seniors always pick on a freshman the first day and I didn’t want to make myself a target for them. I know I will be at some point this year but I’m going to postpone it as long as possible. I heard they gave a kid a swirly as soon as he walked through the door last year. I’m not trying to give myself the same fate. Also they stick to the good ole paddle. My brother who graduated one year before me said that it was his weapon of choice to haze the freshman. He said he used it hundreds of times on the freshman. He even named his paddle after one of the freshman because he got him so many times with it.
I was considering joining the football team this year because I had a sick throwing arm in Pop Warner. In Pop Warner I was on the Terrible Trojans. But, I kept turning the ball over and this kid Jim Jebow was always second string so all the parents wanted him to start playing quarterback instead of me. I hope that’s the last time I ever have to worry about an instance like that.
If somebody had ever found this note I would be finished. I’m sure I would be the target for not only my entire freshman year but also my whole high school career. I would be never endingly terrorized and I would probably have to switch schools. I really hope that doesn’t happen because I really want to become a Jet, that’s the school mascot. I always thought it was kind of stupid to have an airplane as your mascot but I guess there’s nothing I can do about it if it comes to that.
Mark Sanchez
Hey
ReplyDeleteHey
Soooo I have something to tell you
Yeah?.....
But you have to promise not to tell anyone!!
Okay I real honest pinky promise I wont tell anyone! Now just tell me!
Okay sooo its not about me but one of our friends did something on Friday night at Alex’s party..
WHO. WAS. IT.
Well first of all a lot of messed up crap went down at that party! But anyways, Danielle like hooked up with someone.
So? What’s the big deal about that?
It was someone elses BOYFRIEND!
Oh hot damn! No she did not! Who did she hook up with?
She hooked up with Mike.. Chloe’s boyfriend.
Whoa Chloe? As in our Chloe? As in our best friend Chloe? As in her best friend Chloe too?!!!!!!
YES!!! What the hell are we suppose to do?!
I don’t know!
Me neither! Like I don’t know what to do! I want to tell Chloe but I also don’t want to screw Danielle over… You know what I mean?...
Yeah I agree.. I honestly don’t know what we should do.. wait! First of all how did this happen?
Wellll, first Danielle and I got to the party and we had a drink or two and then she saw Mike and so she like went over to say hi or whatever and I went to where Jason was with a group of people and chilled over there. Then after a while I got curious as to where Danielle was so I looked aroung and then I found her on the couch practically ON TOP OF MIKE!!!!!
Holy crap, what the hell do we do?! This is not good! Well talk after school the bell is about to ring
Hey =)
ReplyDeleteHi.
Sup?
Nm.
I don’t like this class very much haha =)
Me neither
I don’t even understand what we are doing!
Maybe you should try paying attention then instead of passing notes to me.
Are you saying you don’t like our conversations!..xx;)
Yeah.
Oh… well… I think you’re hot! ;)
Oh… thanks?
Do you think I’m hot?
Um… well…
It’s a simple yes or no question. Doesn’t need much thinking!
Well, you see… I’m gay.
But you just broke up with your girlfriend.
Yeah, she was just a cover. I’m sorry. But don’t go around telling people that I’m gay because you are the only one who knows.
Are you afraid of telling people?
No. I just decided lately that I am gay.
I thought that people who are gay just know all their life. They have that little spark in them… well at least that’s what my ex-boyfriend told me. He said that he always knew but he just needed to be with a girl to confirm his feelings.
Wait, Jason is gay?
That’s what he told me…
But he has a girlfriend now. He is not gay.
Yes he is. How can you tell me that Jason is not gay? He told me he was!
Maybe he was just trying to find an excuse to just break up with you
No. Jason would never do that to me! We loved each other! We would have lasted forever if it was not for his… lack of interest in woman.
No. You two broke up because Jason cheated on you… with the girl he is dating now.
What are you talking about!
Amber, stop acting like you don’t know what Jason did.
Jason loved me! He would have never cheated on me! I gave everything to him!
Are you really this stupid?
Maybe you should date him because you two are both gay.
Jason. Is. Not. Gay. And neither am I.
But you just said you were gay…
No. I just don’t want you to talk to you… but now since you are already confused about you’re not gay ex-boyfriend… I figure I should probably be straight with you.
So will you go out with me?
No.
But why not?!
Because you are three years younger then me, I have a girlfriend and you are completely insane!
No I am not!
You believe that Jason still loves you… when he doesn’t.
Days like these rant
ReplyDeleteI’m sure everyone has days like these. The ones where all you want to do is lay in bed and scream into your pillow. The days where you just sit there and really think about life and what you’re doing or going with yours. Not everyone can be perfect all the time we catch each other slipping all the time because were only human. Those days where everything runs through your mind.
Where is the love? Everyone hates each other now a day. The girls who were best friends all through middle school don’t even look at each other in high school. Things just aren’t the same. We all want to go back to the days where we were worried about if we could play outside today or not? Not if I’m skinnier then her or prettier than her. None of this matters the weight of the world seems like it’s on your shoulders but so does the guy sitting next to you. We have one life to live. Only one time to make the best out of it, we only have one time to do it. We have to stay strong, even though were just kids.
Were just kids trying to get through this sucky generation and time in society that no one quiet understands? We try to get through things on our own but let’s be realistic, we can’t do it on our own we all need someone to talk to and lean on once in a while. Even though we “hate” each other, we need to get over it we grew up together and at one point we might need each other. Some people have friend ships that have lasted ten years and have never had a fight. Then there are those friends who jump around friend groups some say it’s because they’re fake, but grow up. We are all kids and have a lot more in common then we realize.
my free write.
DeleteAt age sixteen my mother became pregnant. She made a mistake that changed her life forever, but she didn’t let it hold her back. My mother worked hard to make a good life for herself and for me. She raised a baby with no help from my father and with very little help from her family. She got a job, and she studied hard. She was class valedictorian and held me in her arms while she gave her speech. She went to college and got an apartment. All of these things she did while raising me, and raising me well. My mother never made me feel like a mistake. She always told me that I was a blessing, and that I didn’t make her life difficult, I simply made her stronger.
ReplyDeleteFor a long time my mother stayed alone. She stayed single in hopes to protect me. But when I was seven years old my mother found a man she couldn’t say no to. In the summer of 2019 she married Nick Brown. My mother couldn’t have chosen a better man to help raise me. From the time I was seven, until the day he died at age seventy-one, I knew that man as my father. Nicole found true love and a man to raise me when she met Nick. She was a loving wife to him, and together they raised me in a happy and caring home.
Because of my mother, I know that nothing in this world can keep you from getting what you want out of life.
Gathus looked him up and down as he started to walk a bit faster, trying to pass him.
ReplyDelete“You’re insane.”
Eurlus smiled. “It took you this long to catch on, huh?”
Night fell over the city while Gathus was patrolling the streets. Even though he and Eurlus had told the king about the recklessness of the mercenaries he’d hired, apparently there was no one close enough to completing basic to make them into official guards. Eurlus had volunteered to take over the training and had ecided to give everyone a crash course to get them into armor as soon as possible, so he couldn’t go with Gathus on his patrol. He’d adamantly refused to patrol alongside the mercs, and although the king had respected this, he made it clear that there would be other patrols.
Gathus strolled down the streets of Curvisca, looking from alley to alley, making sure everything was sound. His knuckles were white as he gripped his sword tightly. He had to admit, his body may be healing, but his mind mirrors his scarred face. Every glance down an alley, every reflection in a window, nearly anything in sight makes Gathus’ mind jump back to his dream. The man in the mask was on his mind this time, he felt like he’d seen it before. He looked at the ground and furrowed his brow as he thought. It couldn’t have been the man at the party. Could it? No, the man’s mask in his dream had had its mouth broken off. The one at the party had a full mask.
He snapped out of his trance and realized there wasn’t any more cobblestone under his feet, just dirt. Shit, how far out of the city had he gone? Was he really zoning out for that long? Gathus looked around for a landmark but didn’t see anything but a small farm up ahead. He was about to turn back around and go back to the city when he saw a glint of light come from the farm
Hey, Suzie.
ReplyDeleteYou don’t have an extra pair of pants in your locker do you? I kinda… had an accident. I know, it’s so embarrassing but it must have been the bean burrito I ate at lunch. I just, I couldn’t hold it in anymore! Mr. Ferrino would not let me go to the bathroom. And to think I thought he was hot. Doesn’t he understand I’m a girl? Like, I have girl problems sometimes. Oh my god but don’t tell anyone I said that about him. But I guess now he’s has to face the consequences ‘cause this SMELLS. I hope nobody else smells it though. Really, Suzie, I need to get some pants or a skirt or something. This isn’t even a little bit okay. I can’t let my mom know this happened! She’ll probably find out, though, since she bathes me every night. I try to tell her that I’m 17 and I don’t need my mother to wash me anymore. I think I’m perfectly capable of it myself. Imagine if everyone at school found out? She still won’t even let me shave my arm pits. I am not her little girl anymore!! I want to be able to wear tank tops, but everyone will think I’m a man.
What if I ever get to hook up with Jonny like I want? He’ll have his hands on me and then suddenly he’ll feel a small, scruffy animal coming out from under my arms. Oh my god that can never happen. But he’s sooooooooooooo hot. I would do anything for him. I would cut his toenails for him if he wanted me to. And maybe I’d get lucky and I could keep them. Do you think I can clone someone from their toenail clippings? Maybe he’d try to clone me from my armpit hair. But that would never happen. He probably would never want to come near me. I don’t even smell like a girl. I have to use men’s deodorant to de-stink my monstrously hairy pits. Anyway, hit me up with those pants, girl. I’m never going to attract Jonny smelling like a dirty, bean burrito-eating baby’s diaper. Like, this is worse than that time that kid had an accident on the way home from the school trip. This is some serious stuff. I just wish Mr. Hotty would let me get to the toilet!
This class is so boring
ReplyDeleteYa I fall asleep like everyday
Me too it’s terrible
So what happened this weekend?
A lot of stuff
Like what?
Well we were out with the usual people and we were trying to find somewhere to hang out and get hammered and we heard about a party in the next town over and we heard it was going to be
crazy with like over a hundred people and we had to see if it was true or not, so we showed up around 9 with like 20 people and there was only 3 other people there and it was completely dead and we were like the only people there. And on top of that there were no bitches to try to hook up with. So we weren’t havein that so we heard about another party in town that was like 15 mins away and that there were a lot of females there that were ready to hook up. When we got to the house there had to be like 100 hundred people in his house and a lot of them were girls. The party was already rockin when we walked in and we just joined right in. We were alittle behind everyone so we had so catching up to do. It took me about half an hour to catch up to where everyone else was at. That’s when I started to talk to girls from other towns. A lot of girls were really hot and I was trying hook up with them. After an hour I finally found one girl who was mad chill. We were talking for a while and then her boyfriend who was jacked and big as hell came over and tried to fight me cause I was talking to his girl and he went to swing on me and I flinched and then everyone got quite around me and started laughing because the guy scared me so bad I pooped my pants and I ran out of the house before it got any worse. It was a rough end to the night
you would not beleive what i did today today i just did a really really terrible thing and i did it at my job at mcdonalds i ate a customers order i don't what came over me i was just so hungry and i couldn't beleive what i did im sorry boss i wrote this letter because i couldn't tell face to face i just thought that you would judge for this incident i didn't eat all day and i was just so dang hungry it was killing me so i did what i had to do to survive oh by the way it was a angus bacon and cheese it was so good i just told the guy that we ran out of meat and fries he order the meal large it was so tasty i thought no one would notice it was late and he was going through the drive thru and it was just iressistable that burger was it even talked tome it was saying eat me now eat me now eat me now eat me now ahhhhhhhh i can still hear the voices so far they're eating me alive it's so hurtful to think because that's all i can think about when i try to thinkl about something else also it said that all of my employees were the devil and saying that i should fire all of you it also wanted to date me but i said no at first but then i fell in love with it it's so sweet when it talks to me it's gentle and funny even to so when you all get this letter i will be in a insane asylum or ran away with my true and i did both but the burger didnot make it was eatin by someone in the insane asylum he was in a straight jacket and bit it i was hurt i cried for two and a half days but im over it now that it's went into burger heaven anyway i'll see you probably never any it was my pleasure servin you all the manager dan
ReplyDeleteps do not tell the fries and burger i cheated on them with the burger
Hey, beautiful
ReplyDeleteYou probably don’t know who I am, but I’ve watched you wander the hallways many times in between classes. I’ve even memorized every route of your schedule. Sometimes, I can’t help but stand outside the classroom door and just gaze at you. I can’t help but think of how beautiful your long brown hair is when you wear it down your back. When I look into your dark brown eyes, I see my whole future, and even my unborn children. Whenever I hear your amazing singing voice, it leaves me completely captivated. You are the only reason why I go to the choir concert every year. When you graduate, I’ll probably never go to a concert again. Every day, I follow you home and I think to myself, “If only she knew I existed. Do yu remember the person who rang your doorbell yesterday? Your mother answered and I pretended to be a Jahova Witness, handing out a panphlet I made myself. When your mother said she wasn’t interested, I let myself in and asked if she had a daughter. She said it was none of my concern, but I heard your music blasting from your bedroom. It was the Beatles’ “And I love Her,” I remember. I could have just gone up there and confessed my love to you, but your father dragged me out and called the police. Yes, that was me in your house last night. I just couldn’t help myself, So, if you are reading this, and you want to get to know me, here’s my number: 555-555-5555. So call me maybe, and we shal continue from there.
love,
Your secret admirer/stalker
P.S. I figured out the one and only password you use for every website. “Music” was so obvious. Yes, I know you better than you think I do. And at least I admitted I was a stalker.
Hey buddy! I know that we are not supposed to be passing around notes in class but I have something to tell you and it cannot wait! So after school yesterday, I was walking home as usual. As I was walking, I had the most amazing daydream! I don’t just mean some boring thought that appears randomly, especially when your head is filled with like a gazillion thoughts. No, I am talking about a stroke of genius! I know that when most people daydream it is about trivial things, like their crush or what they are going to wear tomorrow. For me, it is completely different! As you already know, pretty much all I ever think about is school, school and more school! What can I say? School is pretty much my life and that may sound pathetic to most people, but I think it is actually a very practical way to spend my time. Anyway, about the daydream! So you know how we have to do a math project for geometry class? I was thinking about making a dodecahedron! The idea just came to me! I think I remembered it from a mathematician book I read last summer. You know I have a photographic memory and can remember practically anything, so I feel like that is where this awesome idea came from. I suppose you are wondering what a dodecahedron is. Well I could babble for hours about it and explain its precise shape, angles, vertices, side lengths… see? Here I go again. A simple definition is a three-dimensional shape that has twelve faces in the shape of pentagons. I know that I can construct a replica out of poster board and I can also include a report on how to formulate and calculate its surface area and its volume. This will be so exciting! I cannot wait to do it! I do realize that the project is not due for another month but I just love homework so much that I am going to start and finish it today. Oh and also, I can’t wait for that chemistry test tomorrow! I know it is going to be a super exam! And don’t forget the English essay that is due on Friday. Mine is already ten pages long and it is not even done yet! I must sound like the biggest nerd in the world. If anyone ever found this note, I would indefinitely be in for many embarrassing encounters at school! Anyways, that was all that I wanted to tell you. Oh and remember to hand in your homework at the end of this period!
ReplyDeleteDear Nathan,
ReplyDeleteSince the first day I move here, I’ve been in love with you. Maybe you don’t remember, but I still remember the moment where you lend me the pencil in first grade. I still have it with me. It holds my precious memory with you, even though it was for less than a minute. I still remember your blue crystal eyes and your brown dotted freckles around your nose. It’s been nine years since then. Every single night, I would always kiss the pencil before I got to sleep. Also, I was your secret admirer who always put chocolate inside your backpack during Valentine’s Day. I would follow you home every day, to make sure that no one attacks you. There was this one time, where a creep was following you for almost a week, and when I noticed this, I called the police on him before he could do anything.
Nowadays, you are always surrounded by popular, pretty girls, and I can only look at you behind the corners. Though, my phone has been filled up with your pictures. I took them while I was hiding. There are pictures of you in gym, when you are half naked, and one when you are kissing your first girlfriend. It was so hard to watch you kiss her, so to forever remember that day; I decided to take a picture. It might be hard for me, but it was a good day for you. You had your first girlfriend, but it wasn’t your first kiss. I stole your first kiss while you were lying on the table, sleeping, in the library. I know it is unfair for you to not know, but it is better that way.
You remember how I told you I move here in first grade? Well, the reason I move here is not because of my parent’s job. My parents aren’t even with me right now. They are at another state. I moved to Connecticut alone, to live with my grandparents. The reason I move to here is because I did something embarrassing in front of my whole school back then. There was a mini debate between each of the homerooms of each grade. Everyone in town came because the debate included first through twelve graders. It was a big tradition of that town to hold a debate between each grade. All the parents came, the police came, and even the town mayor came. Anyway, the first graders had to debate about a conflict in a story they read, and I had to make a conclusion speech and I was extremely nervous. There were butterflies in my stomach and to calm myself down, I drank a lot of water. When it was nearly my turn, I started to feel the urge to go to the bathroom. I tried to hold it until after the debate, but I didn’t work. I peed myself in front of the whole school, and everyone saw, including my parents. The teachers quickly took me off stage and my parent came to clean me up. It was so embarrassing, so I decided to fake sick and not go to school the next day, my parent obviously knew, but they understood me and gave me time. Though, this went on for weeks. My dad said that I had to go to school, but he said that I could change school if I want to. This is how I ended up here.
I don’t regret coming here because I met you. You are the prince of my life and I will love you forever, even if you don’t even know my existence. I will continue watching over you, following you home, and taking pictures to record your life-long timeline.
Your dearly,
Herga Zhang
Embarrassing Note
ReplyDeleteDear Rihanna,
I have known you since 5th grade. I always had a crush on you but I don’t know how to tell you. I’m too scared to go up to you and even say hi. You’re just beautiful and I know you not want to be with a geek like me. I hope I was like the other kids so I can go up to you and say hi. Your hair is so long and looks smooth not like I touched it but I want to, I would love to. You don’t want to be with a boy like me you want a pretty boy like Chris brown. I follow you home and I just like to look at you. In lunch I sit by myself but you sit across the room from me and I just love to watch you eat. Your lips are so big and juicy. When I walk home I walk so fast because I have pictures of you on my wall, and I just can’t wait to just watch you. Sometimes I go to the bathroom and I masturbate to your pictures. You just look so good Rihanna and I want you so bad. I like you and you don’t like me so what should I do? Nothing ill just wait till I get my chance and I’ll make you mine. Well there you is sitting in my English class sleeping like always and I just love to look at you. Now I’m going to throw this note in the trash can because I wrote this when I was bored. (Someone from school found the note next to the trash can and picked it up. The same day he wrote it and they knew it was that geeky kid that always sat alone, and they made fun of him all throughout the year. The kid was made fun of, but at the end of the year Rihanna went up to Ahmed the geek and she asked him out. And he lived happily ever after) the note embarrassed him but at the end he became a happy man.
To my boy ugly,
ReplyDeleteFirst of let me start of by saying you is one ugly ass dude. But im about bored as hell in the freaking class dog. This teacher just talks and talks my g I got nothing else to do but look at Monica and you know she about gorgeous as hell. You should of seen nick do the ugliest face in the planet. So it goes like this we was just chilling in class when nick just walks up to us does the ugly face and tries to talk to Monica when he been did his ugly face. Monica just looked at him and started laughing ha-ha. But yoo ugly I think im in love bro with this girl Monica like when I be staring at her in class she be looking at me back with the face of “ why you’re looking at me but I like it” type of faces bro she just sexy as hell. It’s like I would go out with her but I don’t know cuz I heard stuff about her and that she aint what it seems like you feel me and you know me bro I love to go out a lot and just have a banging ass time. Remember that time when we went to the party in 4th street and we just started bugging the freak out that was the most craziest night ever and your dumb butt busted your ass so hard ha-ha. Dumb those were good time’s man im going to miss you when you leave but things aren’t meant to be and im talking about me and Monica.
TIFFANY
ReplyDeleteI TOLD YOU NOT TO SAY ANYTHING! I can’t believe you told Chad that I was the one who got food poisoning from Friday night! How is he supposed to ask me to prom if all he can think about is me puking all over his carpet?! Ugh, this will never do. He’s the hottest senior is school—the rest of the upperclassmen guys better not really hear about this! I really trusted you, Tiff! Now, he won’t even look at me—he probably thinks I’m gross!
Oh, and speaking of gross—did you see Hannah’s dress today? Yuck! I thought the 1900s was like one million years ago! And her hair? Disgusting! My grandma had that hairstyle like when she was born! I wish people could be more fashionable in this school like me. And oh, speaking of me, Brian totally was staring at me today in math class. Then, he winked at me and told me he liked my outfit, but I just turned away because everyone knows Brian Brown totally tooted in fourth grade! Gross! Only mature guys can talk to me . . . like Chad. Chad Thompson—he’s so amazing—but if he never talks to me again, I’m totally blaming you, Tiff!
Oh, and speaking of talking, doesn’t Ms. Havenworth talk way too much? Like, she talks more than me! ME! I mean, the only thing is that when she walks, nobody wants to listen, but when I talk everyone does! I was in Italian today, and she was so annoying—I couldn’t understand a word she was saying—it was like she was speaking a completely different language or something! I mean, Italian is so easy but so confusing at the same time. Doesn’t “ciao” mean pretty or something? I don’t know—I’m just glad I’m American.
Oh, and speaking of American, we need to go shopping this weekend. My dad just gave me a new credit card after I maxed out the other one I had. It took a little bit of convincing though, but I stole his car and blamed it on my brother—that distracted him. Anyways, we have to go to like every store in the mall. Every single one. Tiff, you can hold my bags again once I don’t feel like holding them anymore. We’re going to have so much fun! Can’t wait!
P.S.: Make sure this note doesn’t drop in the hallway like it did last week again. How embarrassing!
XOXO, Britney
"What's gucci for this weekend, bro?"
ReplyDelete"I don't know man, whatever the gucci God brings us, you know?"
"True dat. Let me tell you about this dream I had, it was so trippy."
"Alright, go ahead."
"So, it starts off with me at my job. I'm just chilling, minding my own business, when a giant wasp shows up. This isn't a normal wasp though."
"What kind of wasp was it?"
"A HUMAN wasp."
"What is that supposed to mean...wtf?"
"Like it was 6 feet tall, stood up on two feet and somehow held things with it's two stinger things."
"Like a Beedrill?"
"Yeah man, perfect interpretation."
"Is that it?"
"Nope, a lot more happened. So the wasp asks for a table for two, he was expecting a date. He was quite gentlemanly for being a wasp. Instead of sitting, he was sticking to the ceiling. My manager actually asked him to get down because he was creeping out the whole restaurant. The beedrill thing then did laser vision at him, to which my boss equipped a flamethrower and attacked him with it!"
"This is insane."
"I know, right. So then his date shows up and guess who it is."
"Who?"
"Godzilla, and she is one crazy bitch. She destroyed the whole restaurant trying to save her date from my boss. After the end of the attack, she stood, staring at me, charging her fire breath. I thought all was lost until my heroine showed up. Guess who THAT was."
"I have no idea."
"Our history teacher, dude. She was a giant and beat up Godzilla and squashed beedrill."
"What happened then?"
"Then she took ME out to dinner, paid for ME, and carried my around. I felt so emasculated."
"I can see why lol."
"Oh man, the teacher's coming now, don't send the note back."
Dear Sean,
I am very honored that I was the heroine in your dream. Despite this, I expect you to pay attention and talk about your fantasies and dreams with Tyler on your own time. That would definitely be more beneficial and maybe you wouldn't feel like such a woman.
"I can't believe you let her take it."
"My bad."